What If?

Ideas have consequences, and some consequences are devastating. Therefore, it is imperative that we look at what we believe and adjust our belief system to coincide with the truth, rather than adjust our “truth system” to coincide with our beliefs. The following “What Ifs” are just that, “What Ifs.” If they are true, we would need to make some radical changes. If they are not true, we can ignore the ideas and experience no consequences.

What If #1

What if we live our lives so focused on not missing out that we ultimately miss out on what actually matters?

It seems as if man is addicted to “not missing out.”  Doing something that brings “gain” in our lives seems relatively unimportant compared to the motivation of not “missing out.” “Missing out” happens to those who are focused on those who have something, or who portray that they have something worthy of missing out on.

An easy example of this is the obvious behavioral patterns that take place as teens register for summer camp. Typically, the registrations come in slowly as students watch what others are doing. Then, all of a sudden, one or two of the students send in their applications, and now, like water breeching a dam, the slew of registrations arrive on the camp registration site. As long as the students do not think they will miss out on something else, or, if they think by not coming to camp they will miss out, the applications roll in.

Christian summer camps have always had a powerful impact on students, families, and churches, yet the registrations do not pour in because of what one might gain from the experience, but from what one might miss out on if he/she does not apply.

Another example might be found in wedding invitations. Often the bride and groom try to trim their list to a reasonable number, and yet, there are always those who contact them and “inform” them that they need to include this person or that person. The idea of there being a party and one not being there is unbearable for some, yet, once again, the desire to go to the wedding is not because they want to honor the bride and groom, and be a witness to their vows, but a deep desire not to be left out.

As we gather with people, we often see that they are connected more with others, who are not with us, than ourselves, with whom they are with/present. They seem to be obsessed with not missing out on what is happening wherever they are not. Selfies and constant postings keep others wishing they were with us, while our minds keep going to where others are.

In all of this we miss being in relationship with those with whom who we are present. It is an illusion of relationships that leaves those who have many “friends” truly friendless.

What if this fear of missing out is really something that God placed within us? What if, ultimately, the fear of missing out we should have is the fear of not hearing “Well done” by God Himself?

We were made to please God and to be pleased by Him. Satan works at counterfeiting this by trying to get us to believe we are God, and thereby thinking that we were made to please us, and that all others were made to please us as well.

This is disastrous thinking that leads one to extreme loneliness, anxiety, and ultimate disappointment. For in the fact that we were made to not want to miss out, and in our attempts to not miss out, we ultimately miss out.

We need not blame Satan for such things in that he seems to just fuel the fires we have started by being focused on self. He seems to affirm that self is most important, and that we would be fools to actually die to self and live for God and others.

Yet, we were made to die to self and to live for others, and we will find no happiness until we do so. In fact, the fruit of loneliness is often produced from absorbing the lies of self-importance.

We know the tree by its fruit, and we know what a person believes by his/her fruit. The fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, etc. Those who truly demonstrate these characteristics, not just display them but actually possess them, are those who are living life as it was meant to be. Those who display them in order to impress others or “make it” in this life are truly most miserable.

Many problems can be solved if we would just recognize them as problems.  However, we have been so immersed in a “Don’t miss out culture” that we do not even recognize its danger.

Think of how many advertisements are based on the idea of you needing their product or service or you will miss out. Think of how the “porn” industry is based on the idea of people missing out. Think of how many single people think they are missing out because they are not married, and how many married people think they are missing out because they are not single. Think about how many children are miserable because they are missing out on being an adult, and how many adults talk about missing out on their childhood, and do not want to miss retirement, while those who are retired are missing out on the beauty of middle-aged living.

Those who walk with God do not miss out on anything. They know that their lives matter, that  their steps are ordained, and that the purpose of their life and death are clear.

The apostle Paul learned to be content in all things. This is only possible for those who live with a focus on not being left out when it really matters--when all is truly said and done and we stand before the only One who actually does matter.